What You Can Expect when We Work Together
Coaching is an intensely personal experience. Your concerns are the center of our relationship, and the only center. I will work with you from the perspective of one who can see things you may be too close to see in your own life, by listening carefully to what you say and to what you do not say.
Your goals form the basis of our work. Sometimes it is necessary to go deep within in order to find the path out. Think of me as your guide on that path. I will point out to you possible obstacles, and I will point out possible options you may not have been able to see. I will ask you questions that will help you refine your choices. I will ask you to consider and articulate the implications of your choices and your decisions. I will support you as you feel you might be floundering. I will support you when you feel you cannot hold up. I will support you when you begin to put your new decisions into action, and you begin also to encounter the reactions of your friends and loved ones. I will help you navigate your new life with confidence, purposefulness, and determination. Your feelings of contentment and peace are paramount in this relationship. Those are ultimate the goals. It is my role to help you define the means for achieving them, and then to help you construct the path that brings you to them.
Entering a coaching relationship is a significant commitment. It will require your active involvement. It is your life we will be talking about. Your growth is the goal.
In order to do this in a way that allows us to see progress toward your goal over time, I recommend that we begin with a 90-day commitment. This will include scheduled weekly telephone sessions. During the week between sessions, you will have the opportunity to reflect on our conversation and prepare for the next. I might ask you to keep a journal of thoughts, feelings, and experiences that come up for you during the week between our sessions. If you paint or draw, I may ask you to utilize those skills in the service of self-discovery through the nonverbal means of your artistic work.
Initially, you will complete some forms which ask you about your goals; about what you feel is blocking your progress; your likes, dislikes; personality, and many other aspects of your life. We will refer to these aspects throughout our coaching relationship, and we will make certain we are addressing them as we incorporate any new goals that may arise during the coaching process.
I will listen, hear, reflect to you what you are saying, and help you in being accountable to your own passions and goals.
Each coaching relationship is unique and it is built upon your needs, your goals, and your intuitive sense about which methods will work best for you in achieving these goals. In some cases, the first order of business is to identify specific goals. This itself can be challenging when you are feeling confused and distressed. I will support you throughout this process.
You can work with me while you are working with a psychotherapist on deeper issues, if you like. This is often a good combination, but it is not necessary if you are focussed on resolving the issues related to managing your life related to your empty marriage and to moving forward.
You hire a CPAs and lawyers. You hire housekeepers and gardeners and caterers. What could be more beneficial than enlisting the expertise of a supportive coach to guide you through an intensely personal dilemma?
I am here for you when you are ready.
If you are not ready, please know that I wish you well in your efforts to resolve the issues that brought you here to read my words in the first place.
To the Person with AS: Your confusing life experiences can be brought into the light. They can make sense. AS is not mental illness, and there is no reason to feel shame, even though that may be a common feeling in individuals on the spectrum. You can learn to connect the deep emotions of compassion and love that you feel to the words that accurately express these feelings. You are not without empathy, though it is possible you have been accused of being so. You can heal these wounds.
To the Neurotypical Partner of Someone on the Spectrum: Your tender heart deserves all the loving support you can muster. Be gentle with yourself. Try to let go of blame. You did nothing to deserve feeling ignored emotionally by the one person you thought would have your back. You can heal. Life can be beautiful again.